Ok, so a while back while I was in college I used to date this older guy and we had a fairly good relationship—but because he was older and he bought me things I started to feel like a dependent. Now because I’ve always had my own and for the most part been an independent woman I had the worst nonchalant “I don’t need you” type of attitude. Oh, but how the tables do turn when you can’t learn to just STFU sometimes! LOL!
Okay, so no shyt there I was in a heated argument with my boyfriend (well I was pretty much arguing with myself) and I am going “HAM” on him! During this time I was the type of person who wouldn’t think before they would speak and my momma always told me that would get me in trouble one day. Nonetheless, I’m still going off on him like he is a stranger on the street that just stole my parking space knowing they saw my blinker (yal know how that is lol). Well in the mist of all of this head nodding, and loud-talking-- I shout out “I don’t need you for anything, I’m straight!” (I’m straaaaaaight *in my T.I. voice*)
He’s just standing there watching me rant and rave not saying a word which was making me even more pissed off (insert song here: I’m goin need you to say something baby *in my Drake voice*). Infuriated with his lack of emotion, I storm out the house in my new all black Steve Madden Stiletto boots (Those were some baaaad boots too honey). But as soon as I stepped onto the porch HOOOOONEEEYYY, I took flight and “down goes Frazier!” My tail personally greeted every step on that porch before finally sliding into “home base” which was the pavement. You see at the time this was in 2003, during that bad snow storm we had in the DMV where everything was shut down for like a week—so it had just started snowing but it was coming down pretty heavy. I turned and looked up at the door and this fool is standing there with a smirk on his face and says “See God don’t like ugly” right before he closes the door. (If my ankle wasn’t hurting so bad I probably would’ve kicked that mofo down!)
I get up, grab what’s left of my pride, and hobble my little self to my car and pull off. Honey, 16 minutes down the road, I’m on the ramp to get onto the beltway and BOOM!!!!! I hit a pothole so big I thought Osama was coming to get me-- my tire immediately went flat! Great first I was “gang raped” by some steps and now I got a flat tire on the side of the beltway in a snow storm. I called my roadside assistance and they said “ma’am because of the storm your wait time will be 4hrs”—what the!?!? I called my peoples and no one was anywhere to be found. I sat there for 45 minutes before I picked up the phone and called him (pride is a muthaf*cka ain’t it?). So of course my dude comes to my rescue and then takes me to the hospital to get my sprained ankle fixed and, just because God wanted to teach me a lesson I ended getting snowed-in at his house for 3 days barely able to walk. So naturally he reminded me every chance he got that I “don’t need him for anything because I’m straight.” LMAO! I tell you crazy stuff like that only happens to me!! If only I can learn to just STFU!
